frustrated.incorporated

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crap… where to start? I've had a kinda lousy day. As far as your
typical bad days go, it didn't start off too bad. Woke up around 10:00
and just watched a little tv and messed around a little on the internet
before I came into work. Once I got into work, I was a little bummed
because I showed up 20 minutes early, yet all the workstations were
full so I got stuck on the one without a phone, which is always a
bummer. From there, the day just got worse… later that afternoon I
had a meeting with my supervisor and I found out that I'm not getting
moved up to full-time like I had kinda previously thought I was.
Seriously, that was just a major blow that I wasn't ready for… I just
don't even know what to say or do. I'd been looking forward to going
full-time for 2 months or more now and was kinda expecting to start
about a month from now or so… When I really think about it, it just
throws all my plans for this year kinda out the door. I had planned on
saving up some money and buying a house sometime this summer – that's
obviously not going to happen for more than a few reasons. I can't
afford a house if I'm only making the money of working 24 hours a week,
but more importantly I can't afford to buy a house if I don't have the
job security of working full time. I also had a few techie gizmo's and
gadgets that I had wanted to buy this year, but it looks like instead
of making money, I'm gonna be stuck living check to check (which sucks)
and in my parents basement (which isn't ideal, as well…)
Possibly
the worse thing about me not going fulltime, though, is that I'm gonna
be stuck at home like 4 days a week for God know's how long. The only
time I really enjoy living in Perham are on the days I work. I'd say at
least 90% of my days off are a complete and total waste for me… it
just bums me out because I thought I'd be eliminating 2 of those days a
week, but now it doesn't look so…I dunno – it's hard to be upset
because I know my job that I agreed to is only a part time job and I
kinda understand why everything was done the way it was, it's just is
hard when things are out of your control. In a way, since I'm the only
person who didn't get the fulltime, it makes me feel a bit like the odd
man out.
It
made me think though… just about life in general. While for a while,
everything had been going very well with me but I knew I was going to
come on a day that was a bit of a downer. When you really stop and
think about it, life is just a series of ups and downs. I've got better
things to do than to sit around and feel sorry for myself. I hope above
almost anything else that I get bumped up to full time sometime soon
just for a little stability and reassurance. While I'm not thinking
about looking for a new job or an additional job (sorry Mom!), I can't
help but think that eventually I'm going to have to come to a point
that I need fulltime. I mean, not a whole lot of people can make a
career out of working 24 hours a week. But, since I graduated early and
I'm living at home, I'm lucky enough that I won't be financially
strapped and don't have to worry about that at the moment. I'm really,
really hoping something opens up… and the sooner the better!
I
was trying to think of the good things that this change of plans may
cause, for no reason other than to make me feel a little better about
myself. I suppose since I'm not gonna be working as much, I can focus a
little more on my training for Grandma's. That doesn't do much for me
since I was going to be training hard anyways. I suppose I won't be
able to afford to do the NYC Marathon like I'd planned though, so that
sucks… Let's see, what else good might come out of this? Umm… I'm
still getting a tv with my tax returns and no interest financing at
Best Buy, so that won't affect me much. I guess I may be able to start
helping out with some basketball stuff, but most of that will be over
within a month, so that does me nothing. I was thinking about maybe
going to do a Speed & Accel program again, but that's a big
maybe… I don't exactly need to get in shape like I did last year when
I went. Another thing that is going to stink is my best friend from
high school is probably going to be moving away anytime soon which will
mean pretty much the only person I hang out with is gone. I guess God
has a plan for everyone and while I'd love to know what mine is, it's
not exactly in the cards. I trust that things will work out for the
best in the end, though…

Dot… Dot… Dot…

  • I
    told you Janet Jackson was going to be made into a bigger deal than the
    game! I'd like to thank her because I've gotten an extra 75 hits or so
    today because people can't spell. In one of my updates the last two
    days, I talked about having supper and then watching the Super Bowl.
    Anyways, tons of people have come to my site today when they tried to
    google something such as: supper bowl picture janet jackson. Haha –
    thanks for coming, y'all but you'll find no fuzzy television boobs on
    this site…
  • I think
    my mom figured out I had a crummy day… I get home and look for cereal
    and I've got Cocoa Puffs, Granola Cereal, Berry Burst Cherios, and
    Golden Grahams. Gotta love her!
  • A
    week from today, run to your local record store and pick up the new
    Kanye West album. It's the best hip hop cd I've heard in probably the
    last year… do yourself a favor and get it next week. Word on the
    street is you're gonna be able to find it for under $10, so you have no
    excuses!
  • I
    wonder how many times over the course of my life I've been referred to
    as Brett. Some people have known me as long as 10 years and still think
    my name is Brett.
  • Ya know what… you can't sound like a man's man if you've ever used the phrase "Tickled Pink."
  • There
    is some talk that CBS wants to ban Janet Jackson and J. Timberlake from
    the Grammy's. I'll tell you what – I'm all about this as well, but it's
    probably for completely different reasons than the heads at CBS.
  • Prince
    is gonna perform at the Grammy's… most people don't care about Prince
    anymore because he hasn't made a good song in like 10 years and he's
    kinda freaky, but I'm actually excited about this. Prince gets it
    done! Besides Prince, the only performance I'm looking forward to is
    OutKast with George Clinton and Parliament Funkadelic – that has a
    possibility to be something just unbelievable. P Funk never gets the
    respect they deserve.
  • My Grammy predictions (and obvious complaints):
  • Record
    of the Year Nominees: Crazy in Love – Beyonce, Where is the Love –
    Black Eyed Peas, Clocks – Coldplay, Lose Yourself – Eminem, Hey Ya –
    Outkast… My prediction is that Crazy in Love will win, but why is
    Where is the Love and Lose Yourself on this list? Who makes these
    lists?
  • Album
    of the Year – Under Construction – Missy Elliot, Fallen (?!?) –
    Evanescence, Speakerboxxx/The Love Below – Outkast, Justified (?!?) –
    Justin Timberlake, and Elephant (meh!) – The White Stripes… Jay-Z,
    Thrice, Thursday, Bubba Sparxx, Third Eye Blind, The Mars Volta, Jack
    Johnson, Alicia Keys, Foo Fighters, Janes Addiction, Linkin Park, Story
    of the Year, Atmosphere, Brand New, Joe Budden, Jurassic 5, A Perfect
    Circle, and Saves the Day all came out with cd's that are better than
    Elephant, Justified, Under Construction could hope to ever be…
    I think the Kast will deservedly win, though…
  • Song
    of the year (how is this different than Record of the Year) Beautiful –
    Christina Aguilera, Dance with my Father – Richard Marx & Luther
    Vandross, I'm With You – Avril Lavigne, Keep Me in Your Heart – Warren
    Zevon, and Lose Yourself – Eminem… Two of those songs I've never
    heard of and three of them I hate… you can tell I'm pumped for this
    category. I'm going with Warren Zevon because he died this year and
    that usually locks up a victory…
  • New
    Artist – Evanescence, 50 Cent, Fountains of Wayne, Heather Headley, and
    Sean Paul… first off, how is 50 Cent & Fountains of Wayne new
    artists? 50 Cent has put out 2 cd's before Get Rich or Die Trying and
    Fountains of Wayne had "Leave the Biker" back in the 90's… 50 will
    win, but I'm protesting.
  • Rock
    Album – Audioslave – Audioslave, Fallen – Evanescence, One by One – Foo
    Fighters, More Than You Think You Are – Matchbox Twenty, and The Long
    Road - Nickelback. Besides Foo Fighters (which is great) and Audioslave
    (which isn't bad), this list really stinks. I've already dropped about
    10-20 cd's that were better this year…
  • Rap
    Album – Under Construction – Missy Elliot, Get Rich or Die Trying – 50
    Cent, Blueprint 2 - Jay-Z, Speakerboxx/The Love Below – Outkast,
    Phrenology – The Roots… besides Missy & 50, those are all pretty
    good discs. What is Jay-Z's old album doing on there, though… it came
    out in November 2002 if I remember correctly.
  • Last
    general comment… the Grammy's are the worst of the award shows. While
    the Oscars and Emmy's usually go to movies and tv shows that are of
    high quality, the Grammy's are turning more and more into the MTV Music
    Awards. Actually, the MTV Awards are more credible in my eyes cuz they
    at least give out an MTV2 Award to an unknown yet really good band
    (usually).

Site updates: I updated the running page
with my weekly miles. I had a decent week last week, so I can't help
but be happy about that. A week and a half until I officially start my
training for Grandma's Marathon! I also made a couple small changes
(picture in the top left corner, buttons on the right hand sign,
learned how to spell the world calendar) The forums have been hopping lately so if you get bored, go check 'em out. Do
myself (and possibly yourself) a favor and sign up today! And
if you're already signed up, check out what's going on…
One last thing about work before I go… I know I rattled on about it,
but you have to understand where I'm coming from. I love my job, I
think I'm very good at what I do and I'd like to do it for as long as I
can see in the future… I think it's just like everything else
though. When things start going against you, you can either make a
commitment to doing and even better job and proving that you are good
at what you do or you can complain and be left by the wayside. I can
guarentee you I'm choosing door number one…

Adios,
-B-